Third Culture Kids (TCK) - How to navigate it for parents and kids.

Are You Creating Third Culture Kids? How Would You Navigate This?

In my situation, my father is Swiss and my mother is Thai. I don’t meet the traditional definition of a TCK (Third Culture Kid), but I still experience life differently compared to someone whose parents are both Thai. In Thailand, I am seen as a farang (foreigner), despite speaking fluent Thai and the Southern Thai dialect. Being called farang does come with certain privileges. For example, when someone tried to scam me, I could start speaking Thai and get away from the situation.

After spending more than eight years in Australia, I’m still not considered Australian—which makes sense. People often assume I’m Filipino or Mexican, but regardless, I’m still labelled a foreigner.

This was difficult to understand growing up, as I didn’t feel a true sense of belonging. However, as I got older, I realised that I am part of a subsection of people known as Third Culture Kids. Instead of trying to change my behaviour or my accent, I accepted who I am and focused on other goals. I stopped getting lost in my own thoughts and started doing what I truly wanted to do, rather than just what was expected.

For Parents Considering Moving Abroad

For couples, parents, or even single people who are considering moving to another country (or who already live in one), it’s important to understand that your kids may become Third Culture Kids. This is an extra layer of identity you’ll need to navigate. They will likely see the world differently than cousins or relatives who grow up in your home country.

Some important points to keep in mind:

• Maintain ties with your home country. Continue visiting and staying in touch with family back home.

• Ensure access to education. Keep up with requirements so your children can access primary, high school, and university education. This can be powerful both financially and culturally.

• Plan for financial security. Stay updated on any requirements to ensure your children can access benefits or payments should you or your spouse pass away.

• Preserve your language. Continue teaching your mother tongue to your children, even if only conversationally.

Why Visiting Family Matters

Some parents believe they’ll move abroad and never return to their home country. While this might work for the adults, it may not be best for the children. By continuing to bring your kids back to your home country, you help them stay connected with their culture and broaden their perspective. This cultural connection is a form of non-monetary wealth that compounds over time.

As your children grow older, they can also seek support or help from overseas relatives if needed. That too is a kind of wealth, beyond money. Of course, if your family environment is unsafe, that’s different—but in most cases, maintaining family ties is valuable.

Education as a Wealth Strategy

Education is another area where planning makes a big difference:

• Primary and middle school: These may not seem as critical, but they still provide the foundation. Parents should stay engaged to ensure their kids are on par academically. Language subjects are particularly important, while others like maths may be easier to catch up on later.

• University education: This can be a huge cost-saving opportunity. For example, if your child has a European passport, they may access affordable world-class universities in Switzerland or Scandinavia. In Australia, students benefit from HECS loans with low interest.

University also offers lifelong networking opportunities. The friends and connections your children make can open doors to both personal and professional opportunities.

Culture Shock and Mental Health

When I lived in Thailand, I wasn’t seen as fully local because of how I looked. Then, moving to Australia brought a major culture shock. This could have been reduced if I had travelled more overseas earlier in life. Even short-term study abroad experiences in primary or high school could have helped.

Culture shock often leads to depression, as it’s hard to fit into a new culture. Many people cope by retreating into their own cultural bubble, which can limit the benefits of studying or living overseas.

Estate Planning Matters

Few parents like to think about death when their children are young, but life is unpredictable.

• If both parents are from the same country, returning with the kids is usually straightforward.

• If one parent is from a developing country, things may become more complicated.

It’s important to plan ahead—both financially and legally.

In my case, my father passed away before I was born. My mother didn’t speak the language and lacked the resources to navigate complex systems. I could easily have fallen through the cracks. Fortunately, supportive family members helped secure child support payments from the Swiss government, allowing me to attend international schools and later an Australian university. But it took four years to arrange everything, and those years were extremely difficult for my mother. Proper paperwork from the outset would have made a big difference.

The Value of Language

Teaching your children your mother tongue is invaluable. Bilingualism (or multilingualism) not only benefits brain function but also broadens perspective. Even if your language is not globally dominant, it can still open doors—whether for university access, career opportunities, or simply cultural connection.

Conclusion

Your children’s perspectives will be shaped by your background, but they will also differ from your own. It’s important to respect that. Living abroad brings uncertainty—social, cultural, or even political. That’s why maintaining ties to your home country is essential.

Continue updating your estate plans, keep important documents in order, and most importantly, support your children’s sense of identity. By doing so, you give them the best chance to thrive as Third Culture Kids.